Shine
by unforciablecure
Summary: The moment Nyssa's boots cross over the invisible portal she dreams up between the corridor and Sara's chamber, she sees herself with Sara one random night locked away in a memory. Post 3x04 – "The Magician"


TITLE: Shine

PAIRING: Nyssa Al Ghul/Sara Lance

Summary: The moment Nyssa's boots cross over the invisible portal she dreams up between the corridor and Sara's chamber, she sees herself with Sara one random night locked away in a memory. Post 3x04 – "The Magician"

A/N: Two things can be responsible for this extended drabble. 1: The endless depression that I find myself in and 2: Muse's "Shine" – I've been listening to them a lot lately and "Shine" gave me a lot of Nysara feels. I debate which version of Shine is more affecting- the acoustic or the electric version?

* * *

><p>The moment Nyssa's boots cross over the invisible portal she dreams up between the corridor and Sara's chamber, she sees herself with Sara one random night locked away in a memory.<p>

It fills her suddenly and almost completely with a numb feeling, a numb feeling she's yet to get a hold of, and she moves over towards the window. The view of the bay was meant to distract her yet she can see it all.

Sara's tentative handhold as she pulled Nyssa (her _mentor_) into her room.

It was a small chamber reserved for only new members of the league. Nyssa had always promised to move Sara to a bigger, grander one - she sees herself saying those exact words in the memory - but Sara would always tell her that it was okay, that she had a soft spot for the room over hanging a scenic bay of Nanda Parbat.

It wasn't their first night together, Nyssa remembers that all too well, just one of the many nights that they spent together in Sara's chamber.

The wind had picked up, blowing a gale against the faint velvety curtains over hanging the large window to a balcony. Sara lets go of Nyssa's hand to tug the curtains to a close.

'They did not see us leave' Nyssa hears herself say, a careful smile emerging on her face at this.

'So we're sneakin' around again?' Sara turns around, smirking. 'And here I'd thought I'd left those days behind. I like it'

Nyssa's eyebrow rises. There was yet another story to be told. She'd heard about the boyfriend of her sister but something told Nyssa that this was yet another escapade of Sara's that she hadn't heard before. Nyssa shuffles across the floor, unusually thankful to be free from her usual armour. 'Being the heir to them demon has its advantages- its privileges'

'So they just look the other way, huh' Sara hums, moving closer to loop her arms around Nyssa's neck. She was sure that they had already had this conversation sometime before.

'Mhmm, something of that accord'

'How can they do that?' Sara says, quietly, eyes never wavering from Nyssa's as she feels her mentor's hands rest on her waist. 'When you look like… _you_'

Nyssa laughs lightly- she blankly shakes her head at herself- continuing to see the memory unfolding in front of her eyes. She wasn't sure she could stop it from happening if she tried (which she does – closing and opening her eyes once, twice) and the brief pause makes the memory appear all the more sharper.

'Ta-er al-Asfer'

Sara bites her bottom lip, a curious smile playing across her face. Since her time with the league she had discovered a newly found attraction for Arabic – a factor that hadn't slipped past Nyssa's radar. She would never admit to doing so, but sometimes Sara would mess up on the pronunciation of certain words just so she could hear Nyssa correct her. With the amount of time they were spending together, Sara could see herself being fluent in the language before the year end.

'That is my name' Sara hums, arching up as Nyssa pulls her closer. 'Have I told you how much I adore your accent?'

'Hm?' Nyssa kisses her gently. 'Once or twice'

Sara laughs, wrapping her arms around Nyssa, kissing her faster and harder. They stumble across towards the low rising bed, falling backwards on to it in a sync which only practice could bring. This time Sara was on top and Nyssa was pretty much okay with that. They hadn't been together like this since two nights previously and the urgency was seeping through the air.

'I could do this forever' Sara murmurs between kisses, gasping as she feels Nyssa tugging at her white tank top. She tries her best to sit up, raising her arms up until her top is pulled over her head to reveal a grey bra and they resume their kissing.

Nyssa chooses this moment to flip Sara over, pinning her down with her knee pressed into her core. She leans back to remove her clothing, a blank tank top, looking down at Sara.

Nyssa feels everything; Sara's touch, her sudden intake of breath as she kisses down her chest.

'Nyssa?'

She watches herself take a moment too long to respond, too caught up in the silky soft skin.

'Is this what you'd always dreamt that your life would be?' Sara asks, this time running her hands through Nyssa's messy hair in a bid to re-capture her attention.

Nyssa thinks of her current situation, straddling Sara. '_Yes_' she decides moving to take Sara's lips between her own. Sara kisses back hungrily, feeling her bottom lip being bitten teasingly. Frustratingly – for Nyssa – Sara breaks off the kiss.

'N...no. Not _this_' Sara laughs lightly, angling her head to the side to deny Nyssa her attempts to get what she wants. Sara grasps Nyssa's sides gently. 'I mean, do you ever think there's more to life than just… this?'

Nyssa slides from her waist, turning over onto her side next to Sara. She could tell this wasn't going to be one of their usual conversations. 'I earned this life' She feels Sara shift next to her. It wasn't a reprimand but it sure did _sound_ like one. 'And it is dangerous to speak of such things' In the confines of Nanda Parbat, at least.

'I made a vow. To the league' Sara breathes. 'And to you and you know that I would never break it. I just wanna know if you could ever see yourself leaving this behind' She sees the pained look staring back at her. '_Theoretically_'

Nyssa sees her own look of indecisiveness_. _'Could you leave it all behind?' She hears herself say.

'I've got a family that doesn't know I'm alive' (that's a confirmation, a _yes_ disguised in other words)

_I'm your family _Nyssa wants to say, _the league is your family_.

Sara continues. 'It's not like it would be difficult to go back'

_Silence_ and then;

'Could you leave me behind?'

'Who said anything about leaving you behind?' Sara tries to make it sound like it's a possibility; like it's a future that they're destined to arrive at one of these days. 'You could always come with me'

'You have simple ideals' Nyssa laughs, short and sudden as Sara hugs her from the side. If only it were that easy. 'Don't ever break them'

'So?' Sara smiles lazily. 'I have _simple_ _ideals_' She feels Nyssa reaching out, caressing her side and she knows it's in these moments that she can be honest. 'I always wanted to have an apartment overlooking the city. We could get a cat and stay up late watching junk TV' Sara pauses. 'Although… it's been a couple of years, I don't know what'd be on these days'

'It sounds as if you have given great thought to this'

'Yeah, well, dreaming is free' Sara says, eyes fluttering to a close. She leans in closer. 'Maybe I'll get that apartment one day'

Nyssa finds herself back in Sara's chamber, blinking blankly out at the bay. She feels numb and exposed in the place which was supposed to bring her much comfort and security. Maybe if Sara had of been beside her she would be feeling those exact words; not cut out and hollow like she did.

Nyssa sighs, glancing around the room. There were little reminders of Sara everywhere; clothes still left out, scribbled notes on the dressers, a couple of her books resting next to the bed. Nyssa would spend the night going through everything if it meant bringing her closer.

* * *

><p>When the memory re-awakens, it's of the same night but only a few hours later.<p>

'I feel like here, in Nanda Parbat, there's no sense of time' Sara's lying on her back now, almost bare bar the light sheets of the bed spread covering her waist. Nyssa watches herself drawing circles against her back, mesmerized by the motion. They would always do this- find themselves having the most intimate of conversations post-sex.

Nyssa glances down at her hand, lost in the memory. She feels a sudden pang at the realisation that she would never get another chance to do the same. Her fingers would never get to caress and touch Sara's smooth skin again.

'I feel like everything just… _stops_'

Sara closes her eyes as she feels Nyssa kiss her shoulder and then her back. 'Do y'know what I mean?'

Nyssa nods, hands trailing across to where she's just kissed. 'Everything just stops when I am with you'

Sara laughs. 'Well, we've been in here for _hours_. There might not be a clock but I know because it's light out'

Nyssa angles her head to the window, a hand brushing down Sara's shoulder blades. True to her words, the early morning haze of sun rise was beginning to punch the sky, pushing its way through the velvety curtains. 'And you are complaining?'

'_Definitely _not complaining…' Sara says, turning over onto her back, a hint of a grin forming on her face at how sleepy her _mentor _was. 'Just… _observing_'

Nyssa kisses her hard, like they've just met for the first time and Sara kisses her back just as fierce.

'Tell me that you will always be here' Nyssa's eyes are wide and pure against the rising light of day. Sara was sure that somehow, the light in them offered up more honesty than they normally would.

Sara blinks. In retrospective – and retrospect is a funny thing – Nyssa can see the acknowledgement of the weight of the words on not just her own face but also Sara's.

'You know I will' Sara tells her. She always was so sure of herself. _Was_.

Nyssa pulls out of the memory, glancing around the room. It reminded her of so many occasions and of so many happenings yet everything felt oddly calm and reserved. The chamber door had been left open, like it too waited expectantly for Sara to stroll through, cross the invisible portal, _alive_.

Nyssa feels the sudden sting of tears growing in her eyes, a thick tightness swelling in her chest- no – her _soul_ and for the first time, she doesn't fight the tear drop which splashes to the floor.

She sniffles, trying to avoid or delay the impending tears but they begin to fall before she can really try.

So Nyssa starts to cry.


End file.
